Days go By

Love game

2011-09-19T02:04:00.002+08:00

Ive told u not to fall in love with me!

U are just too stubborn and uve fucked our friendship.

Please!

Ive told u before, my heart is still owned by someone.
To be with me, is a risky task. Coz once that person summons me by my name, thats it.
I'll go runnin back to her.

Right now she is still my 'home''.. No one can take that spot yet.
It might take a few years or a quarter century for someone else to take that place.

I know, things changed. Im not her home anymore. Im not the hubby anymore.
I know u are worried and u want to take my pain away. But........
Still my heart is owned by this one and only girl.. Yes im drowing but let me be. Let me taste all this.

So darlin here's to u. I hope that u'll find someone new. Forget me and go with ur life.
Falling in love with me is a big NO-NO. Okay? Please dont take this hard. U are one hell of a girl. U can find someone better.

Razlan Shah is here to stay and to wait for his love of his life and wont go nowhere.

Take care,

Razlan.

i dont know

2011-06-17T00:11:00.002+08:00

i dont know what is God trying to show me.

all i know is only pain i see..
from what had happened, till what's happening,
till what's coming, i really dont know!

no clues,
no hints,

Ya Allah,
please guide me.
and if she is not the one,
why does it has to be like this?

i am in pain.
i can't say it out loud.
i have no one that can listens,
and the only one who really can listen is her.

but she is no longer here.
her heart has been taken away by god-knows-who..

i am clinging on a very thin string. very thin..

please show me some mercy Lord.

again i am saying, i really do love her. and i really can't live without her.
so, Lord, please, enlighten me. show me something.

goodnight.

When i see u smile

2011-06-15T02:47:00.003+08:00

The love that has grown in me,
Made my heart sinking in..

Only u,
The one that can bring me back to life.

Im sick of the questions,
Sick of the answers..

Only u,
The one who can make or break me..

Im tired of the thoughts,
Tired of the tears..

Only u.
The one who can kill me in that instance.

Come kill me. Come break me.
I am all that.
I deserve all that.
In fact, im immuned to all these.

It was u all along.

...

Passing of the greatest love of my life

2011-06-08T02:34:00.002+08:00

Grandma. U had to leave. Even i cant prevent that...
I love u soooooo much. What we had together was termendous.
U took care of me since i was small, till i am a grown up.
"Tired" was never in your daily vocabulary. But u just had to leave..
Grandma. U are my everything.. Everything... I love u so much.

Still i remembered that i stayed in to look after u and toasted some bread with cheese..
And i made it just for u. We sat down together, eating and watching TV. Just me, u and that moment.

I love u grandma. I still remembered u fried my favourite fried rice. I love u. Nothing can tell how much i love u. Only god knows..

So now tok odah, i am willing to let you go coz i know u are an angel sent to earth to look after us.
Everyone misses u tok odah. What uve done for us, cant be replaced with anything.

I love u tok odah. We love u tok odah. Rest in peace. I love u. Al-Faatihah.

In memories Saudah Abdullah (1930-2011)

hints

2011-04-05T14:37:00.002+08:00

hint me off like that.

turns me on,

make me go gaga,

and u'll know what pleasure do really means.

weird postings

2011-03-26T09:59:00.002+08:00

i've got my pay. but for what?

teaching the girls to dance and to do the Haka.

oh my god!

i dont know anything about my jobscope. it's super pathetic.

cmon. please start the training.

damn it.

working etiquettes

2011-03-22T11:20:00.002+08:00

im already in my second week here in my new work place,

but i've learnt nothing.

nothing yet.

just super looking forward for the Hakka.

time a lil wasted.

eternal

2011-03-20T19:28:00.003+08:00

the eternal beauty stays. how old u grow. how vast u changed.

it stays.

and i can spend my entire lifetime just to look at u.
talkin to u.
smile and just smile.

theres nothing that i am lookin forward to when im lookin at u.
coz with u, theres no past, no future.

its just the moment that i wanted it to last forever.

oh so adore.

rammed

2011-03-07T23:10:00.002+08:00

got a hit by a train.

its weird coz all these while i never give a damn to what people might say,

but just now, i had a talk with someone and it hits me like a bullet train.

yeah.

it's harsh, but i might take it into my considerations..
i am fighting my own policy of not listening to others. yeah. thats what i need.

maybe by taking this step might break me, but to think back, it will build me up in a better way. (i hope so)

as for u, maybe u are right. thanks.

awak la.

2011-03-03T23:23:00.002+08:00

awak la lawak,
lawak tu awak,

awak kena kurung,
kurung dan kepung,

tiada kebebasan,
tiada jalan,

membuat orang disini gelisah,
mnjadikan orang disini resah.

itu lah awak,
awak yang pelawak,

lawak kasar kutulis,
mungkin awak akan tepis,

kerinduan yang saye sampaikan,
awak hanya abaikan,

hari-hari makin tak menentu,
awak hanya diam membatu,

awak tak fikirkan saya?
awak hanya fikirkan mereka?

saya di sini sudah setengah gila,
awak di sana hanya membuang masa,

perlukah awak ada disana?
ada di sana setiap masa?

sebab tu saye ckp awak ni lawak.
lawak awak terbawak-bawak.

saya terjangkit dengan lawak awak,
lawak awak yang hanya membuat semak,

lawak lawak lawak.

_razlan_

As for today..

2011-03-03T04:02:00.003+08:00

i am afraid of thunder.. i am awaken by the thunder.
i never sleep alone in thundery nights.
help...

but now, i think im alright.
thinking about the practice i had with Bella, Tony, Toby and Smokey.
damn. they are pure american niggers. Toby is from Chicago, Tony is from Washington D.C. and Smokey is from L.A.

they are super talented musicians. and i felt so small among them..literally i'm smaller than them.
they all call me "lil' feet"... they thought my shoes were Bella's..

damn..

but when we went into the studio,
i had to bring ma black ass-nigga-side onto the drums.

im glad they liked ma grooves.

gave them a hard-straight-delicious-funky beats.
and yeah, the USA's musicians saw a potential player.(i hope so)

but in the end, these music jobs are just for hobbies.
imma follow what my mama says. so, my fantasy/hobby world are not to be taken to the professional level. it's super prohibidado by mama.but it's fine wimme..

my Chombee a.k.a. cajon(pronounced as ca-horn) is my faverett thing to be played when im bored or when i need to practise. oh yeah! talking about Chombee, this weekend theres an acoustic show. imma use my chombee. :D yay! after quite sometime, she's out again!

so, yeah. i love my life now. except for the love life. kinda shaky.

so, nights. the thunder is striking badly and i cant sleep.

the best policy

2011-03-02T14:09:00.003+08:00

im feeling super alone.
yeah. i have great friends surrounding me.
i have great people yet to meet.

but one person that i really NEED to see, cant see me.

i hate to be rude, but all i know is things are getting bad.

from bad to worse, it really slices my heart.

now im numb from the inside coz of excessive blood-loss.

so, please. make a stand. come and see me immediately coz i am losing life.

and for me considering of having a new girl is a big NO NO coz i will hurt her.
hurting her by being with u again. i cant run away from u. cant u see that?

so, an honest answer im giving u is : Yes. i cant live without u.

bercakap dengan bulan...

2011-02-21T09:49:00.002+08:00

I know you're somewhere out there,
Somewhere far away
I want you back..

My neighbors think I'm crazy,
But they don't understand
You're all I had

At night when the stars light up my room,
I sit by myself,

Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or am I a fool?
Who sits alone
Talking to the moon

I'm feeling like I'm famous,
The talk of the town.
They say I've gone mad.
Yeah, I've gone mad.

But they don't know what I know,
'Cause when the sun goes down
Someone's talking back.
Yeah, they're talking back.

At night when the stars light up my room,
I sit by myself,

Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or am I a fool?
Who sits alone
Talking to the moon

Do you ever hear me calling?
Cause every night, I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you

In hopes you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or am I a fool?
Who sits alone
Talking to the moon

I know you're somewhere out there,
Somewhere far away...

jealous.

2011-02-21T02:55:00.003+08:00

my girlfriend drives a E46 BMW M3. my dream car. and im jealous.
i don't think i am up to her level, YET. but what to do..
aku pisau cukur. and aku pisau cukur paling berjaya.(kata orang lah)

im not happy, but i think she will be happy with me. i guess.

i think alot of people knows her. thats the bad part. the popular girl.

it's okay.

i sent her home just now, and yeah, i took the cab home. double charge as usual. i wont let her drive alone back home. dangerous.
as my car broke down a few weeks back, now my only car is her car. damn.

hurmm.. just pray that this one will work..

luv,
Razlan

undeniable.

2011-02-21T02:46:00.003+08:00

filled with love?

is that correct?

damn

goodnight.

flames.

2011-02-12T02:01:00.003+08:00

I don't understand why..
See it's burning me to hold onto this..
I know this is something I gotta do..
But that don't mean I want to..
What I'm trying to say is that I love you..
I feel like this is coming to an end..
And it's better for me to let it go now than hold on and hurt you..
I gotta let it burn.....

Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to,
Got somebody here but I want you,

Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas do you feel my pain?

It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late

You've been gone for too long
It's been fifty-leven days
I'll be burnin' till you return

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but,
hate the thought of her being with someone else,

Let it burn,
Gotta let it burn...

I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on,
On the other side I wanna break down and cry,

So many days, so many hours,
I'm still burnin' till you return...

sniff sniff

2011-02-11T02:33:00.002+08:00

yeah. sore throat and flu attacked me.

i am feelin lucky and cute in this mood where,
my nose is red.
my eyes are watery.
my mood swings like hell.
and i am really into cuddling/gomol2.

so, in this mood again, sadly speaking, i am a claustrophobic guy..
whenever i am in a small place, i'll go gaga...

i developed this on my bday,
where i had to sit in a satria neo's back seat with 2 other big guys.
and i almost threw up.

damn!!

but okay.
as for now, imma lay my head, pretend that i am alright, and sleep.

p/s : im high on cough syrup. do forgive me.

hurmm........

2011-02-09T03:18:00.003+08:00

Now this is gonna be the hardest thing I think I ever had to do,
Got me talkin to myself asking how I'm gonna tell you,
About that chick I've told ya'll I was creeping with,
Said she's 3 months pregnant and she's keepin' it..

The first thing that came to mind was you.
Second thing was how do I know if it's mine and is it true?
Third thing was me wishin' that I never did what I did..
How I ain't ready for no kid and bye bye to our relationship..

Sitting here stuck on stupid trying to figure out,
When, what, and how imma let this come out of my mouth,
Said it ain't gon' be easy,
But I need to stop thinking,
stop contemplating ,

Be a man and get it over with,

I'm ridin' in my whip,

Racin' to her place,

Talkin' to myself,

Preparin' to tell her to her face

She open up the door and didn't want to come near me...
I said, "One second, baby"
Please hear me...

And this by far is the hardest thing I think I've ever had to do,
To tell you, the woman I love,
That I'm having a baby by a woman that I barely even know,
I hope you can accept the fact that I'm man enough to tell you this..

And hopefully you'll give me another chance

This ain't about my career

This ain't about my life
It's about us....
Please..

guilty pleasure..

2011-02-03T00:42:00.003+08:00

in this modern day,
life is gonna make you scream and go crazy.

at that point, you might go out and chase the wrong things.
but at sometimes,

wrongs can be and feel sooooooooooooo right.

so, you might act up crazy.
and at times you could be so mature.

all i know is i am confused and dazed.

nevermind..

it's me and my mind that u don't need to mind.

how bad

2011-01-28T22:32:00.003+08:00

how bad u treat me,
how bad our life is,

i dont write it out.

how many times do i have to tell?

our internal, stays internal.

if i start to bloat out shits, i think u cant handle it.

so, please. be mature, be responsible.

i luv u and i always do, so, think.

life?

2011-01-25T02:09:00.002+08:00

now i feel so god damn low.

lots of shits in my head ready to knock me down.

oh. my birthday is comin up. and it has to be a blast. it has to be.
im spending like hell for this.

gosh. gimme the strength to go thru 6 hours of stupid licence shit and the JPJ computer test what so ever.

nights.

duhh

2011-01-10T01:20:00.003+08:00

well.. i know that i am not that GOOD in music.
so, let me be what i wanna be..

i think whoever joins that stupid AJL is good. they are good enough to write songs,
they are good enuff to be on stage while for others, just sit at home, watching and throwing critics.

for me, being someone who could control the crowd is good. being someone who controls the crowd and yet be the crowd is EVEN BETTER.

so, for the artistes out there, lay low. be humble. don't be too proud.
and for the fans, learn to appreciate others too.

it's better when we can unite and still compete for the better.

thats all.

regards,
Razlan Shah

one eighty degrees.

2011-01-08T23:27:00.001+08:00

my life..

it's turning good now.

total 180 from the past few months.

so, for the suckers out there, bring it on!
let us see, who's the best there is...

LOVE,

Razlan Shah.

rawrrr...

2010-12-27T01:56:00.002+08:00

loving my life.
living every inch of it.
the air that i breathe everyday is sweet..

and the best part is, i love my own life.

:)

grenade.

2010-12-19T01:29:00.003+08:00

this song grenade by Bruno Mars, u once gave it to me. and now i don't understand what is it all about.

it seems like this song reflects you. not me..

read it, get the meaning.

coz i am burning.

Easy come, easy go
That's just how you live, oh
Take, take, take it all,
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble from the first kiss, Had your eyes wide open -
Why were they open?
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked, Cause what you don't understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I’d jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya
I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ;
But you won't do the same

Black, black, black and blue beat me till I'm numb
Tell the devil I said “hey” when you get back to where you're from
Mad woman, bad woman,
That's just what you are,
You’ll smile in my face then rip the breaks out my car
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes you did
To give me all your love is all
I ever asked Cause what you don't understand is

I’d catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I’d jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya
I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ;
But you won't do the same

If my body was on fire,
You'd watch me burn down in flames
You said you loved me you're a liar
Cause you never, ever, ever did baby...
But darling,

I’ll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I’d jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya
I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ;
But you won't do the same.
No, you won’t do the same,
You wouldn’t do the same,
you’ll never do the same,

i officially hate this song...now. and so forth.

kawan-kawan.

2010-11-11T20:09:00.001+08:00

mulut macam puki babi. tak reti tutup.

bercakap pasal orang. kutuk orang. hina orang.
smua pandai.

tapi cuba la cermin diri sendiri.. please

macam sial..

pegi mati.

good for u.

2010-11-03T18:45:00.003+08:00

good for u..

but for me,

i am like this.

just that i think somebody up there dont like us being together coz u are far better than me.

i am not that great u see..

and yeah.

nothing..

layout.

2010-10-30T10:18:00.001+08:00

hari ni. meaning sekarang, nak tido. semalam party macam gila.

then after bangun, nak practise.

tomorrow show wedding.

monday gi melaka.

tuesday ada kat melaka.

wednesday pun kat melaka.

thursday balik subang

friday kerja.

sabtu maybe kerja. kalau tak kerja, ahad aku nak balik penang.

sampai la aku mati...

pilot?

2010-10-29T04:57:00.002+08:00

i wish im a pilot.
so close to be one but, it's okay..

but ive chosen this path. to be a rockstar. and i am rockin it right.

it's alright.

that pilot of yours can suck it. :)

i think, when i become the real rockstar, imma hire him to be my pilot so i could order him around.....with my toes. not fingers kay..(bitchy gila)
*fly on a Gulfstream of course. not the fucking commercial shitty airplane*

so, brother. u can suck it.
dah ada bini, berpada-pada la kay?
jangan nak play sangat.
silap2, bini kau mengandung, then bila beranak, kelua anak negro.muahaha!(true story)

so, now, i am playing things clean, clear, crystalle..
i am not seeing anyone. actually im sick of it.
let me breathe for a while.
i am not a crazy ass guy who fucks around anymore.ANYMORE.
if u still have doubt, sorry la..

okay lah. reading those really gave me a heart burn. thanks so much.
i wanna sleep and try to get a nice beautiful dream.

goodnight.

gimme more.

2010-10-23T19:41:00.002+08:00

i could give u more if u could gimme more.

u always made me sick and tired of your SMS. which is full of assumptions.

please!

grow up!

live in assumption life!

arent u tired baby?
arent u?

i am feelin rather terrified recieving your text.
coz i know deep inside my inbox theres a beast ready to make war wimme.

please..

if u really love me, then please..

hold me gently.
talk to me nicely.
treat me nice..

please!

i cant think..

2010-10-21T06:23:00.002+08:00

what now?

now u are telling me that u dont need those material things?
when things between us went worse?

gosh..

can u please slap me now.

all the way before this, u said i need to cope up with your needs and wants..
"cant accept the challenge?" u uttered.

it's painful..

to downgrade a man's ego and stands.

so, now, i am finding as much money as i could.
to take up the challenge i guess.

the thing is, i realized that i need to prove nothing to no one.

and i am lost now..

what i've been tellin u all the while before this didnt come up to your sense at all?

that's saddening..

really sad..

goodnite..

great

2010-10-20T05:28:00.002+08:00

things went worse. and worse.

but i am trying to get back on my feet, which is impossible..

it is hard to go through this shits alone.

when i have no one to back me up.
when i have no idol to look up to.
when there's no air for me to breathe.
when love happens to be the most hurtful feeling ever..

i cant do this alone.

lately what i did was just plain work, work, and work...

it's saddening to bury my life with only work.
it's pathetic to earn money and u see it burn in front of your eyes.

maybe you don't understand.
maybe u are still a kid.

it's just maybe.
nothing more.

goodnight.

Lost.

2010-09-23T03:42:00.002+08:00

i am feeling bad.
i am feeling sad..

why does bad things do come and chase me down the street?
till i have no room to breathe.

only 4 walls kept slammin me, myself, and only me.

i am alone in this thing called life.
a vicious cycle..
a very cruel place to be..

life..

suck the 'F' out of life..
then u'll know the answer of life's true meaning.

love made me the man who i am today,
love crushed me as well..

i dont know in what to believe.

love?
life?
family?

oh gimme a break...

things went from bad to worse..
it is worse.

Leave me alone to rot and die.

i am too lost..

2010-08-05T07:34:00.003+08:00

i don't know what my mind is telling me.
i just hope that u are doing alright.
i don't really know whether we were meant to be,
or we are just destined together to fight.

love kills, love hurts,
at least its something rather than dirt.
it made us not as free as a bird,
at points,you will find it absurd.

i love u is a simple sentence,
simple yet meaningful,
it can be spoken no matter the distance,
it might be something useful, or regretful.

Sharifah Ili Anati,

u've been great all these while,
thanks to u for all those guidance,
u left me with a smile,
it kills me, that instance.

do u even care?

2010-08-02T10:32:00.003+08:00

i feel that your attitude of being a 'kiasu' girl is eating us up.

dont u feel so? please look at it..carefully.......

for a simple shit, u could piss me off just coz of unknown reason....

come on.

wheres your pride and honor?

i cant see those no more. its been much and much more missing.

i know i am being a grumpy and shitty fella.
but.................

fuck it.

bye.

blue eyes.

2010-05-20T22:33:00.001+08:00

i love my eyes.
and i dont care if its blue or what.

take care of my eyes, i will..

i realized..

2010-05-05T00:13:00.002+08:00

i realized that i wrote too much crap.
too much things..

i read what i've been writing for the past 2 years,
well..its all crap..

i mean not crap.. its just so not me...
hurmmm

but nemind..
maybe this is me.

well..

so long..

can u feel the music in the air...

2010-05-03T04:07:00.001+08:00

i am so in love..
i am attached to u...
i feel lonely without u..
please dont go..

i miss u already...

hurmmm...

okay macam ni..

2010-04-23T16:53:00.000+08:00

esok aku nak kawin..
tapi aku tak bleh..

ish.. bosan la..

mama tak kasi duit...
gaji tak masok lagi.. macamana ni??

mati lah.. jom.

i write it, i like it, what the hell u care?

2010-04-18T01:47:00.002+08:00

told jah..
he is an ass..

hurmm..
think back la sayang..

why am i not surprised or pissed?
coz i've told jah..

i sayang u..
and if i could, i would send him my Achilles, Hercules, Zeus and Hades to murder that asshole..
haha...

cool kan perangai camtu?
orang yang macam tu ke yang sayang i mix around?

well, it does look like the rest of the clan macam tu..who knows?

i am tired of these shit.
i cuma gelak.sebab i rasa i dah besar. dah adult. ni hal kanak2 la sayang..

pedulikan smua bullshits ni..
not even worth a single cent.
hurmmm...

sorry and goodnight.
p/s : BEE CHENG HIANG, U ARE DEAD.. haha!

stay strong...

2010-04-14T11:33:00.002+08:00

u know what... i've never had any best friends...

i am that type who is bound to be alone.. and alone shall i be..

my best friend is always my girlfriend and my family members..coz to them only i can be true to myself. plus they NEVER failed me....

i often get hurt with FRIENDS. but it's a good thing..
when they do that, indirectly they taught me what do friends look like..
the result is, ugly man...

so, till now...i don't have best friends nemore..coz people often fail other people..

stay strong, coz the path that we choose determines who we are..
plus without them people by the side, u wont die...

trust me, family and ur partner is the main key and they are actually ur BEST FRIEND.

please...

2010-04-06T16:56:00.001+08:00

i am not like before..

dont do this to me..

please dont force me like this..

its bad..

i just want it to be only me and u..

cruising the dreams that we planned..

dont ruin it..

im beggin u..

apa?

2010-03-22T01:19:00.001+08:00

apakah happiness?

well..

ask yourself, do u laugh, smile, or at least grin for what has happened?

then thats happiness. :)

excitement.. :)

2010-03-14T14:58:00.002+08:00

Let me put a little bit of excitement,
Up in yo lifestyle,
You gotta know the times of the essence,
I'm talkin right now,
I can get, get rid of that headache..
What you doin tonight?
Some say that sex is overrated, but they just ain’t doin it right..
I keeps it interesting baby just take them clothes off..
I'll be your Tylenol,
Just take me till you dose off,
Wake you up in the middle of the night and take you to another world...
You'll wake up in the mornin feelin like another girl.

day?

2010-03-13T00:59:00.003+08:00

i was up quite early and i dont know why..

plus my iPhone dok buat hal.. ( no coverage, but i am in cyber kot )

i was so pissed and annoyed by what happened last nite.*damn i miss her*

then i started to pack my stuff..
but i felt so relaxed..

i kutip cymbal one by one..
kutip toiletries one by one..
snare..
pedals..
baju baju koto..

hurmm..

then went back to SS19. a fuckin big mansion but no food..
hungry..

then Zarra ajak me teman her do facial at Bukit Bintang..
then walk with her around Sg. Wang Plaza and BB Plaza. ( she is quite a walker,damn )

then she went to do her facial..

i was walkin around..
to survey sum stuff at Low Yat..

then after a few hours wasted, Zarra called me, then we go home..

along the way...
after the Smart Tunnel,

the car semput-semput.....

*bad sign*

PETROL EMPTY.....

ngam-ngam at a dark corner,covered with trees..confirm cannot nampak punya..
silap2 mati kena langgar.....

car honks is blaring here and there....

so, i need to take sum actions..
be a traffic policeman..
with a torchlite in hand, and iPhone on the other..
gila!!

i managed to divert the trafic.but the car that passes by is so fast..
fakker..

i almost got hit like.. a million times!
shit..

then nak gadoh summore at the roadside.coz that motor wanted to langgar me..

fakker..

then Zarra's frend came to the rescue..

then i drove the Citroen home,
while Zarra went with her frend to sumwhere, i dunno..

at home,
i am dead coz no key to go in.
so i went to Carlos to 'pow' my frens there for sum decent dinner..

then i drove uncle Bob's Mercedes to sumwhere that i dunno..

now here i am..
writing blog in the car..

i am a boring person..

2010-03-11T15:58:00.001+08:00

i am... and i will always be..

my type of fun is diffrent..

hope u could cope widdit..
and yeshh...

i will try to cope with urs too..
coz i love u..

please dont..

2010-03-09T23:28:00.003+08:00

jangan assume okay?

i love u..
and it will never change.

dont frickin write things that u are not sure of!

and 'bout ur ex-es, i hate them...yes indeed...
but the thing is, i dont hate u...and never will..

please...

look me in the eyes..

2010-03-09T13:37:00.005+08:00

look me in the eyes and tell me, do i look like i fuckin care?

what u said towards me, reflects u.

u made urself looked stuoid.

and as for your boyfriend,
he is a ****...
thats why he could "LOVE U THE WAY U ARE".. hahaha!
a joke that is.

and by commenting on her blog, wont make any difference..coz she knows what u are made of.

i am a better man, far better man without u.
with u, i felt useless okay?

i was laughing all along..

thanks anyways.
ciao.

RAZLAN SHAH.

silence.

2010-03-08T00:49:00.004+08:00

silence.

weee.....

2010-03-05T18:14:00.001+08:00

ma da ade iPhone..
and blackberry.
and N95...

Pa pun nak pakai jugak :(

takpe..

esok pa beli PublicPhone...
baru tauuuuuu!

offishall...

2010-03-04T02:10:00.001+08:00

i am officially broke, and dead and tired and beat up..

please kill me someone..

love?

2010-03-02T02:23:00.001+08:00

ape ye?
ape tu?

aaaaa...

pening..

tapi one thing fo' sho' ,

i am in love witchu...

crazy lil thing called love.. :)

indah..

2010-03-01T03:52:00.003+08:00

indahnya...
wajahnya bersinar,
ibarat matahari menerbit di mata..

indahnya..
wajahnya berseri,
lebih indah dari cahaya bulan purnama..

pertama kali aku sedar,
akan kewujudannya,
hati ku berkata-kata lawanya manusia,
tidak ada gunanya,
aku berdiam disini,
harus aku kenali, peri baiknya sendiri...

tetapi setelah bertahun aku memerhati dia,
aku dapati perkara-perkara luar biasa,
aku kagumi caranya,
semakin lama,
semakin sukar,
aku menggelisah....

hurmm...

2010-02-26T17:03:00.002+08:00

sory love... i was just catching up with my life..
kinda need it a lil' bit..

but my love towards u will never fade...
it stayed strong..
it stayed faithful and cool! :)

i love u hot girlfriend that i am proud of to be with! ( a mouthful i know )

luv,
Razlan.

love...

2010-02-21T22:32:00.002+08:00

to me.. love is just an intimate warm feelings relation between two person..
it doesnt have to be between a husband to a wife, a boyfriend to a girlfriend.
from a man to an animal is also called love..

it has no boundaries..

well..

what i wanna say now,
it depends on the individual to categorize love and the definitions of love may vary..

so, pick your side..
pick your love.
pick your life..

don't regret whom or what u've loved before..
coz they were the one who taught u, what is life, and what could happen when u are too careless in life..

i love u..
and i think its the right choice to love u.

i lived to love you.

finally..

2010-02-18T05:31:00.001+08:00

finally i told her...
and i am glad she could accept it..

i love her no matter what...
so...

this stupid feelings,

shoooooo....

*go away*

i love u sugar..
so much..

dont go.

shhhh...

2010-02-17T02:22:00.002+08:00

i am happy..
you shut up..

dont u ever give me those voices..
the voice that can shake my grounds towards her..

coz i aint gonna move..
i aint gonna back down..
i aint goin nowhere...

shut up..
and take back ur low life voices back in ur ass.

shut up and live.

imma do the same...

she is here...

2010-02-12T23:50:00.002+08:00

she is here right beside me..

i love her so much..

and i want this to stay forever..

i love u baby.
and only u..

:)

jom pegi tgk muvi!

to be only yours, i pray...

2010-02-12T05:36:00.002+08:00

There's a song that's inside of my soul,
Its the one that I've tried to write over and over again,
I will wake in the end when it calls,
But you sing to me over and over and over again,

So I lay my head back down,

And I lift my hands and pray to be only yours,

I pray to be only yours,

I know now you're my only hope,

Sing to me the song of the stars,
Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again,
When it feels like my dreams are so far,
Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again,

I give you my destiny...
I'm giving you all of me...
I want your symphony...
Singing in all that I am...
At the top of my lungs...
I'm giving you all...

still u..

2010-02-11T12:48:00.002+08:00

still have u..
still want u..
still need u..

i am coming home to u.
and i will always be there with u..

i love u forever..
and forever we will be together..

let me love u.
let me hold u..
let me do the things for u..
coz u are my princess.
u are my queen..
u are my life..

dont u ever go..
coz if u go, i have nothing left..

all i wanted is sincerity.
all i needed is your love towards me..
all u need is u my baby..
aint nothing will take u away from me..

for those things that we've argued,
well, it's for the better..
we became much much much happier and stronger.

i love u love..
and u are the only one that's always on my mind.

gila kah aku?

2010-02-10T01:05:00.000+08:00

aku gila la..

gila rindu kat bini aku...

rindu gila...

more?

2010-02-09T00:46:00.004+08:00

i am giving u more and more now..

givin myself to u..

opening myself to u..

accepting u the way u are...

loving u like u want me to..

i love u..

dont u ever doubt me... or i'll literally kill u...

whatever u wanna say, say it..

i aint listenin coz all i wanna do is to love u.

*shut up and let me love u*

gaga wu lala..

2010-02-06T04:07:00.004+08:00

hurmm

a day filled with excitement.

woke up and my brain started to work...........

worrying sick about today's schedule..

but well , who knows...

the power of a creature named, woman..
changed my perspective in every way..

if she is not here,
i think i wont be able to handle all those shits.

sayang..u have to know that u helped me alot..
for the past week i've been witchu,
i am happy..
and happy..
and happy...
nothing less, always more..

thanks syg..

and to my fellow STOMPERS,

thanks so much!
i am proud of u guys.
i am thankful that we managed to pull it off..

yeah.. thats about it for today..

:)

hehe.. crazy joy!

2010-02-05T03:13:00.000+08:00

i love u syg..
thanks for comin down to KL wimme..

:)

i really appreciate u!

i love u.

thanks again sygsss!

birthday

2010-02-03T23:08:00.002+08:00

it was a disaster...
till somebody,which is my sayang, came to the rescue...

i was blinded all these time,

i am stupid, i know..

i tak faham u..
i tak kenal u...
tapi,
for now,

i tgh mencuba..( no! dont try. just do it! )

i tgh buatkan diri i untuk faham u.
untuk kenal u.
untuk sayang u.
untuk buatkan u sayang i more..

i am trying to do all that....

i harap u beri space dan masa untuk seketika syg..

i love u...

second of February...

2010-02-02T01:00:00.001+08:00

i get the BEST gift ever..

i am melting...

happy birthday Razlan.

baby...

2010-02-01T04:28:00.003+08:00

i dont care what people say..
i dont care what u say..
i dont care what others say..

i just dont care anymore...

i love u so much.
and u are gonna be mine till the end of time..

i would kill for this love..
i would sacrifice everything for this love..

dont u go nowhere.
dont u go far away.
dont u leave me here.

just stay wimme.
be wimme..

and i will make ur life easier.
and i will make our life better..

i love u Sharifah Ili Anati..
take care..

see u in a bit..

baby dont get me wrong..

2010-01-31T19:48:00.003+08:00

i love u n only u..

nothing more..

please k?

i dont wanna make enemies.

i dont wanna be anyone's enemy..

i hope u understand..

i love u and to u only i will answer.

bright...

2010-01-31T02:19:00.001+08:00

i am feelin lucky!

i love u!

loneliness..

2010-01-30T22:34:00.002+08:00

i am alone..
i wanted to be alone...

but not this kind of 'alone'..

i miss my baby..
gosh i miss her so much..
this feelings that i am havin,
it is killin me! ugh!!!
please let me be free..
please take this feelin away..
i hate this feelin...

and...
my percussion group pieces are not perfect, yet..
still there are bumps here n there..

haihhh...

hope i can make it done by tomorrow...

i need my extassyy!
babyyyyy!!

why do birds suddenly appear?

2010-01-30T01:41:00.002+08:00

its coz u are here...

i love u syg..

i need u syg...

dont break my heart okay?

u are the best thing that has ever happened to me...

i dont want it to be sumthing ugly later..

so, pack ur past, and store it sumwhere else..coz i've done the same..

i love u my bb..

p/s : take care in Sabah.. i love u.

quit..

2010-01-28T20:27:00.002+08:00

Razlan is never a quitter.

but...

in this case, i will quit..
i am quitting music...

i hate this scene..

its full of shit!

SHIT!

kronisma, pilih bulu, bodek, menipu!

smua tu ada! argh! why cant everyone be a lil bit professional?

SHIT!

this is from my baby..how sweet of her.. :)

2010-01-28T11:33:00.002+08:00

*mengada*

Baby and I'm here for u!
Challenge yourself,
Push yourself,
Believe in yourself,
Love yourself,
Be DIFFERENT.
Perseverance is all you need.
Don't ever let them go over board,
Don't ever let anyone dictate you,
Don't ever let yourself down for those unnecessary resentments.
When people talk bad of u,
it is because you are one step ahead of them.

I love you
I love you more and more each day
I love you
I love you till my core brings me to the grave... :)
I believe in you
and I want you to believe in yourself. From what I see, you are more than that. Leave and do what's good for u. always i said so.

-thanks sayang for the response-

stop...

2010-01-28T02:54:00.004+08:00

dont step on my head...

i am not here to please anyone.

i wanna do wat i wanna do..

please...

and sayang.. i need u so bad..

malam dingin...

2010-01-27T03:55:00.002+08:00

malam dingin memeluk diriku..

deruan angin membawaku pergi...
pergi..
pergi...

pergi dari alam nyata..
pergi dari alam maya...

bawaku ke dunia idamanku.

tiada kebingungan,
tiada kekeliruan..
tiada kehampaan,
tiada kekecewaan...

terdetik hatiku yang makin merindui si Dia..
jiwaku semakin meronta..
tiada nafas atau kata..
yang mampu membawaku ke sana..

setelah membawa diri bersama satu kenderaan fana,
baru aku terdetik..
bahawa kekeliruan ini adalah hasil dari permainan minda..
yang membawa arus negatif..
memberikan ku kata dua.
boleh menjatuhkan ku di mana jua..

aku berpegang pada janjiku.
aku hanya mencintaimu dan tiada dua.
aku perlu berada bersamamu,
hingga hari tua...

berjanjilah wahai kekasih..
kekasih yang menyimpan hatiku..
berjanjilah padaku yang kau hanya untukku..
dan aku tercipta untukmu..

Sharifah Ili Anati.. kuberikan diriku untukmu.

awak..

2010-01-26T23:44:00.000+08:00

saye rindu awak...

saye sayang awak...

tapi....

awak ni....

its not there...

2010-01-26T03:11:00.002+08:00

i am having the weirdest dreams.

i am having sleepless nights.

i am having bad thoughts.

i am having terrible nightmares

i am having unbalanced emotion..

i am having all these coz it's not there..

it's just not there...
all along..
please..
don't..

and remember, the place where i've been is a place where u cant even imagine.
a bad, sad, rotten, place...

so, please take care of yourself..
be good..
coz i am not always there to catch u.

i am not always there....

luv,
Razlan

fragile..

2010-01-25T20:49:00.003+08:00

heart...

it is such a fragile item...

u break it,
then it is hard to mend it.

u take care of it too much,
it will rebel against u.

u let it lose,
u will lose it.

u throw it away,
it will come back.

u kill it,
it is immortal.....

what can u do to make it good?

only one.....

BALANCE..
yes..

only balance could tell u how to take care of a heart.

luv,
Razlan.

hahaha! :)

2010-01-23T21:07:00.004+08:00

sory.. no post lately..

i am so cuffed with love...
oooh....

i love u sayang...

u are the best thing that has ever happened to me.. :)

hahaha...

i cant write but i am smiling and giggling non stop...damn...

Puteri..

2010-01-15T00:23:00.002+08:00

Harum semerbak kasturi indah mewangi
Cantik rupa parasnya puteri di sinar maya
Cinta bukannya semata yang ku perlu zahirmu
Puteri

Kini kau tiada lagi tinggallah aku sendiri
Rindu di hati ku ini tak dapat aku sembunyi
Entah bila kan kembali
Setelah kau pergi.

Puteri. malam ku dingin tiada pujuk rayumu
Kembalilah.ku kehilangan tawa mesramu itu
Puteri.malam ku dingin aku kehilanganmu
Kembalilah.mengertilah oh kekasihku
Puteriku

Dengarkanlah rayuan hati
Tak sanggup aku kehilanganmu
Di dalam jaga aku keliru
Mengertilah

Kembalilah
Malam ku dingin tiada pujuk rayumu
Puteriku.
Ku kehilangan tawa mesramu itu
Kembalilah
Malam ku dingin aku kehilanganmu
Kekasihku.

Mengertilah kekasihku.

Kekasihku...

kembalilah...

Masih...

2010-01-06T14:38:00.004+08:00

Masih ada dengar tawamu,
Masih ada simpulan senyummu,

Harus kah ku risik sesuatu,
Untuk menggantimu,
Mainan fikiran lena ku..

Kini manis sentuh dakapmu,
Namun, kosong ruang jawapanmu,
Khayalanku...

Jika kuteruskan hati ku kan luka,
Jemarimu ku lepaskan,
Walau ku ingain cuba,
Khayalan masih bergenang,
Masih disisiku
Kelibatmu menghantuiku
Bermula berakhir..

Kesalku...

Peninggalan

2009-12-26T04:34:00.004+08:00

melepaskan sesuatu yang kita suka, amatlah sukar...

hati yang rosak, tidak mudah dilakar..

tapi, jika anda fikirkan tentang apa yang anda sayangi, terasa sayang untuk membuangnya..

membuang, atau dalam kata yang lain, menolak, dapat menyelamatkan kita.

perasaan yang kita punyai, harus ditolak ketepi.

supaya jiwa ini tenteram kembali..

keranamu ku berserah segalanya,

keranamu ku korban jiwa raga.

keranamu hatiku tidak tenteram,

keranamu mulut tidak dapat berdiam,

terima kasih cinta,

untuk segalanya,

nukilan hati selembut sutera,

jiwa tenang, hidup bahagia.

Luv,

Razlan Shah Abdul Hamid.

wawa...

2009-12-21T22:47:00.004+08:00

wawa comel...

dia suka kacau paksu dia..

suka annoy paksu dia dgn kecomelan dia..

nak gigit die tak?

Penangku..

2009-12-21T04:05:00.001+08:00

i miss u...

penangku...

i am here..

and i am happy..

i suke...

Pulang...

2009-12-20T03:34:00.003+08:00

kepulangan yang dinanti...

membawa hati yang girang ini...

pulang ke pangkuan famili,

gembira tak terkira diriku ini,

aku gembira....

kepulangan aku sangat bermakna,

ketiadaan aku amat dirasa,

ketiadaan di samping keluarga..

membuat hati ini rindu sentiasa..

aku dan dirimu....

aku rindu.

aku rindu,

aku rindu dirimu.

sepertimu, aku juga mahu dirindu,

aku dan juga kamu,

kita semua saling merindu...

keluarga tercinta..

pulanglah ke pangkuan keluarga,

emak,ayah,kakak,.abang, yang tercinta,

sesungguhnya aku tercipta,

untuk membuat kalian gembira..

Luv,

Razlan Shah Abdul Hamid

mama...

2009-12-17T16:26:00.003+08:00

i dont want this to end...

luv u mama...

nak dudok celah ketiak mama sampai bila2...

ur son,

Razlan Shah Abd Hamid..

Cameronian

2009-12-17T03:27:00.006+08:00

A vacation with the family is sumthing that i am lookin forward to...

a nice time at Cameron Highlands with the family means alot..

checkin in at Cameron Highland Resort made our trip a worth while...

hurmmmm....with a luxurious room setting,it made me wanted to stay in the room lookin at the golf course...

ahhhhh...heaven yaw..

i wish this never ends...

by the way, i am already freezin here...

gtg to sleep...

nitey nite..starry nite.

luv,

-Razlan-

U went away...?

2009-12-14T03:19:00.003+08:00

i hate things like this...

u left me clueless..

u left me alone...

u left me all by myself..

buried in the silence of the answer.

i hate things when it became like this.

i just dont need shit like this.

thanks so much to u..

thanks so much ..

i've learnt alot from you.

at least a thing or two.

i guess i know what i've gotta do.

but its

Penang

2009-11-29T03:17:00.000+08:00

back in Penang for a few days..to clear my mind,,

then nak kene pegi terengganu...

ummm..

take care Lan.

DONE!

2009-11-26T02:24:00.002+08:00

i've done my Diploma Showcase!

it was awesome!

i love it!

love it!

urmmm...

but yeah...

when i looked back in time...for the past three years,

i missed alot of stuff.

even what happened between me and her,

i am still thankful it happened...

it was quite an eye opener to be exact.

i learnt alot.

yeah.

but what the hell..

look forward..

march proud..

heads up high..

be yourself,Razlan..

luv,

-Razlan-

hidup stengah mati..

2009-08-17T01:14:00.000+08:00

rasa macam tak berbaloi...

aku nak settlekan apa yang perlu...

cepatlah habis...

tolong lah!

damn...

2009-08-06T00:44:00.001+08:00

sakit..

demam...

keja betimbun...

idea tak kelua...

hidup tak tentu arah...

otak serabot..

kaki sakit...

h***y gila...

fikiran bercanggah...

aaaaaaaaaa!

Alhamdulillah.Things started to get better.. :)

2009-07-31T02:23:00.003+08:00

yeah...i am happy now..

financially stable..

lots and lost of gadgets and gizmos.

new apple laptop (macbook).. :)

new ipod touch.. (my online mate)

new ipod shuffle (for me to go jogging..nuthing more)

new handphone.. ( Sony Ericsson W850i)

not forgettin..

i've got my Credit Card...hohohoho! happy tak terkira.. :)

and my ASB for the future..

then i got my new leather shoes.

new pants..lots of 'em..

new shirts...

the most important thing!

NEW LIFE!

yeah...new life..thats wat i am most happy with..

Thank Allah S.W.T. for this wonderful life u've given me..

Thanks to Mama...i love u ma! so much!

wat people were sayin was true..when one door closes, anothe Ten will open..

wait......did i say 10? i guess its more then 10..hahha...

ciao,

may happy life lies ahead infront of u...

bloodline...

2009-07-28T23:54:00.002+08:00

What the diffrence between that?

its red...

red from the blood cells..

but for scientific purposes,yeah it does matter...

but in marriage,it does not...

i say no!

NO!

so,what is wrong with that?

its the same!

please provide me with sum answers?

please!

marriage...

2009-07-26T04:42:00.003+08:00

marriage...

its sumthing big..

its sumthing that change lives..

its sumthing i am lookin forward to...

coz i love u...

ive known sum people,

ive been thru worse,

ive been thru it all...

and i know its much worthy with YOU...

YOU...yeah...YOU...

u managed to manage my life at sum points..

u made me a better person..

u made me a person who i didnt see it way back before this...

u made me see that i am much more worth it...

u made my day..

u taught me patience..

u taught me forgiveness...

u taught me togetherness..

u taught me to be me...

i am thankful to have YOU...yes.. YOU...

i cant wait to make u mine...

the legal way,

the religious way..

know that

u are my savior,

u are my hero,

u are my future wife...

u are my life....

sorry

2009-07-21T16:06:00.003+08:00

im sorry for the bad words..

im sorry for the bad thoughts..

im sorry...

u can go on with ur life..

but dont ever forget me..

i know i am bad...

i know i suck so badly..

but..

remember who am i to u..

remember what we went through..

remember how hard izit to stay with u..

remember those times when we cried together..

remember those times when we laugh together..

remember what i've done for u........

and i will do the same...

take care..

and your happiness is my joy..

i do mean it..

so long to a person who i use to call baby...

so long to a person who i use to embrace...

so long to a person who i use to laugh with...

bye..

thanks.

2009-07-16T03:15:00.000+08:00

thanks for making my tears ran down my cheek..

i hate u..

u crossed the line

2009-07-14T00:16:00.002+08:00

u crossed the line..

but now,

im swimmin with my beloved swimmer...

sayang swimmer i...

changes..

2009-07-11T07:15:00.002+08:00

its 7.21 am and its rainin...

i am cold and i really need sumone to hug..

i need sumone to talk to me..

i need that sumone...really really in need.

i guess not..

she changed...

all started after i moved out from there...

it is so painful to face..

she changed...

i love being around her...

i love being with her...

i love her...

but days go by..

and things started to change..

yeah...eventually things will change...

i am not ready for this..

baby.dont leave me..

i promise i wont be the bad person anymore..

im all for u baby..

please dont leave..

2009-07-09T12:47:00.002+08:00

fine day....

dont fuck it up razlan..

encik Ip dah call pagi tadi...

"WHY ARENT U IN CLASS!!??"

shit la....

i dont know what happened to my body clock..

i always sleep at 2am....ended,wakin up at 12 or 1pm!

muthafucka!

i think my body is very tired kot..

tapi please la..not untill 10 hours of sleep everyday la macha...

ok..imma go and practise now...so longgg... :)